I received a telephone call from a woman who asked how her grandmother’s half-brother and his descendants were related to her. Someone told her that they were not because her grandmother and her half-brother did not have the same mother and father.

They are related, but there is a "half" relationship.

"Half" relationships exist between people who have a common ancestor but descend from different spouses of that ancestor. Half cousins have only one grandparent in common rather than two. The term is more frequently used for siblings who have only one parent in common. For example, half brothers would have the same father but different mothers or they would have the same mother but different fathers.

"Full" cousins are individuals who descend from common ancestors by the same number of generations. First cousins have in common two grandparents and their ancestors. Second cousins have in common two great-grandparents and their ancestors. Third cousins have in common two great-great-grandparents and their ancestors.

That satisfied my caller, and she went on to her next question. She said she didn’t understand "removes."

People who descend from common ancestors by a different number of generations are cousins "removed." The term "once removed" indicates a difference of one generation and "twice removed" is a difference of two generations. For example, Allen is my first cousin. His son Derrick is my first cousin, once removed.

I think it’s easier to understand removes if you look at a chart. There is a good one at About.com.

There are "step" relationships and "in-law" relationships to further confuse us. "Step" relationships and "in-law" relationships occur as a result of marriage, and they are not blood relationships. A stepson is the son of one’s spouse. A brother-in-law is either the husband of one’s sister or the brother of one’s spouse.

Nicky, our eight-year-old, recently asked how she is related to her cousin Jenny. Taylor, her much older eleven-year-old sister, told her that since Jenny is the daughter of my foster-daughter, there is no blood or legal relationship. However, we all feel closely related. That satisfied Nicky for a moment. Then she came back with a wonderful observation that let me know she understood. She said, "But if Jenny was related by blood, then her step-father would be our step-uncle."

In a few more days, we will be welcoming the new year. This is a good year to connect with some of your cousins, both full, removed, or half.

© 2006-2007

Connie Lenzen, CG